Sunday, September 11, 2011

COWABUNGA DUDES!!!

Man has it been a wild week! Between work, cartooning and a massive power outage that hit San Diego (and quite a few other places) last Thursday, I wasn't sure I'd have time to do this today. But luckily, here I am, ready to answer the many questions I've gotten from younger wrestling fans since last Monday night. So let's all take a short break from reflecting and listen in as I solve the mystery of the Super Shredder.

Not surprisingly, the CM Punk/Kevin Nash program on RAW is turning a lot of heads, with Punk very quickly becoming the next Stone Cold here. Having already called Nash on his previous failed gimmicks (he's yet to mention Master Blaster Steel for some reason), Punk had to really dig deep for his latest insult, and boy did he come up big. THE SUPER SHREDDER! Who was the Super Shredder you ask? Was this another WCW brain fart of the early 1990s? Well, not exactly. Although Nash was in WCW at the time, the Super Shredder was the mutated form of the Shredder that Nash played in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle 2: The Secret of the Ooze. What? Don't believe me? Well, here's the proof:

Ya know? The only question I ever had about this movie was if the ooze only mutated organic material, how is it that the shredder's armor mutated as well? My God! I just questioned the logic of a twenty-year-old kids movie! It's official, I've lost it! Amazingly enough, a lot of people don't remember this film, which is surprising given that it came out in 1991 and was wildly popular, despite having almost no name talent in it. They also show it on ABC Family on a fairly regular basis, so you'd think somebody would at least know about it. Of course, it also spawned Vanilla Ice's only other hit: Ninja Rap. I'd post it, but I'm just not that mean a person.

Anyway, I think we all know Nash's story from here. Went to the WWF, became Diesel. Went back to WCW, started the NWO. Came back to the WWF, blew out knee twice. Made a couple of movies. Went to TNA, left TNA, now back in WWF/WWE. And just to put some rumors to rest, Nash's "firing" was part of the show. You see, he's about to shoot a movie, but the production company's insurance will only cover injuries suffered on set. So until the shoot is over, he can't wrestle. It's a pity really, because this thing with CM Punk was really getting over too. Oh well. We'll just have to wait and see how it all plays out.

That's all for now. I'll be back next time with some more goofiness I'm sure. Until then, y'all take care now and never forget the fallen.

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